Friday, 31 December 2010

Moving Forward, Backwards Style - 2010 in review.

Hello Bigmouthies. Thanks to a browser hijacker and a bunch of other adware, malware, spyware and fuck-knows-what-else-ware, I can’t get online via my laptop, so the final blog for 2010 comes to you from my phone.

It's been a big year at Bigmouthery. This time last year the average daily traffic was around eight page views. Thanks to you, Bigmouthery took off, relatively speaking, in 2010. Page views sit around a fairly constant 100 per day, with a sustained spike of about 300 coming on the back of the Roger Avary exclusive in July.

This blog was going to be a bit of a clip show, looking at some of this year's most popular entries and rants. Unfortunately I can't do that right now, so I hope my thanks for your support will suffice. When you're sitting on 8 page views a day, 3 of which are probably your own, any hope that your blog will attract some kind of following is pretty hollow. I can't resolve to make the blog any bigger next year, but I can make it better. 2011 will see more entries, with a view to making Bigmouthery its own entity by the end of the year.

I'm not usually a New Year's Resolution kinda guy. Promising that you’ll make a life-changing decision (and stick to it) based on a tick of the clock that punctuates the end of a Gregorian year…always seemed odd. This year, though, it dawned on me that that's a copout, especially for someone who rarely devotes any time to changing anything except underpants for special occasions. With the last few days spent in relative seclusion, reflecting on a year that nearly ended without me in it, I had the chance to take stock. I don’t mean that to sound overly melodramatic, it’s just a fact. So in 2011 I am making resolutions. I may even tell you what they are sometime. By the way, if you ever have a chance to spend a silent few days solely in the company of cats and birds, take it.

My love and special thanks to my brother Conor, and my dear friends Chris, my soul sister Renae, Falon, Louise, Nick and my heart, Rhonda, for helping me make it through 2010 in one piece. Much love also to those from unexpected corners who offered their strength, support & understanding. I'm still here...due in no small part to you.

Before I go, please revisit the top 5 Bigmouthery blogs for this year, in order of visits:

1. Pulp FACTion - Roger Gets Out of Jail.
2. Owning Racism.
3. Marys Getting Married.
4. Bipolar Bumblebee.
5. Teabaggers - A Gobful Of Bollocks.

I also wish to make a correction to my 10 Best Albums of 2010 post. I had included Plan B's 'The Defamation of Strickland Banks' in the short list of entries that just missed out. It's definitely worthy of being on that list...and near the top too.

Happy New Everything, everyone.

Friday, 17 December 2010

The 10 Best Albums of 2010.

Most everyone loves reading the 'best of' lists that dump on us in the last couple of weeks of the year. When they get to the end, though, many suddenly get pissed off because their favourite song or movie or actor or news event or celebrity stool sample wasn't included, or didn't place as highly on the list as they wanted it to...or the list features something they hate.

I always have a bit of a giggle reading internet comments like 'How could you not have Mischievous Pubes by Revolving Bum vs DJ Poo Poo? You suck!' Surely they can answer that stuff themselves: 1) they didn't hear it, 2), they thought it was good but not good enough for the list or 3) in their opinion, they'd rather shove a burning match down their nob/up their girl bits.

Anyway, here are my favourites for the year. I don't listen to Triple J so 'new' music comes either by accident or recommendation. Sometimes I get in early, sometimes I'm late. Either way, I hope you enjoy.

Sunday, 12 December 2010

Under Milk Wood.

Hello. Been a little quiet here, mainly because I've been working on a play. I'll be back soon, meanwhile you can read an interview about the play here.


Sunday, 5 December 2010

The Way to San Jose

Most people have a little store of humming tunes, a list of 'standards' that come to mind absent-mindedly when they are present-mindedly doing something else. One of the songs in low-rotation on my jukebox is 'The Way to San Jose' by Burt Bacharach and Hal David, most famously sung by Dionne Warwick. Dionne's often asked me if I know the way to San Jose, and in my little sing-songy moments I've asked myself the same question. Then, the other day, I realised with no little shock that I had no idea how to get there! How could I have lived all these years and not bothered to find out?! Criminal!

So...for those of you who live in my city, at's the way to Sane Jose:

Taking the centre of Brisbane (or CBD) as a starting point you have two options. You can catch the Airtrain at Central to the International Airport. Alternatively, you can drive or take a cab. There are a couple of ways you can go, but remember, Dionne says we're looking for 'peace of mind', so let's take the more scenic, riverside Kingsford Smith Drive route.

Follow Queen St till it becomes Wickham. Keep going, through the Valley, Newstead and Brekky Creek until swinging right onto K-S Drive. Look at the boats. After about 2km, turn left onto Nudgee Rd (did you know that Nudgee is an Aboriginal word meaning 'place of ducks'?). Get onto the E-W Arterial and hang a big fat right at the big fat roundabout. Now you're on Airport Drive. Follow the signs to the International terminal.

I'll let you take care of your flight arrangements. Quite a few flights go to America. Luckily, you want one going to Los Angeles, which is normally the first mainland stop anyhow. The pilots will do most of the work on this leg of the journey and their routes are subject to change, so I'll just give you a rough directional guide:

Once on the ground and thoroughly poked, prodded, interrogated, blood-tested, tissue-typed and body scanned at Los Angeles International Airport, you have a variety of travel options to San Jose. Amtrak offers a train journey on the Coast Starlight line, starting at Union Station and conveniently ending in San Jose. There's a bus service from LAX that'll take you to the train. You can also fly and take the bus. Not simultaneously.

The hell with that, though, let's drive. The quickest route is up through State Rout 5, but we're going a longer way, taking in San Luis Obispo .

Leaving LAX hang a left on S Sepulveda. Take the Imperial Hwy West I-105 E ramp towards Imperial Terminal. Merge near Norwalk. Get onto the I-405 towards Santa Monica. Then one of the reasons for coming this way, the 101 at Ventura.
Keep going to CA-1 N exit near Hearst Castle. Hang a right onto Toro St, then right onto Higuera, just past Monterey. Turn onto Santa Rosa, then right back onto the CA-1 at Walnut. Left on Toro. Merge back onto the 101 and drive baby, drive...170 miles. Merge onto CA-85 N via Exit 377A toward Cupertino. Merge onto CA-87 N toward Downtown San Jose. Take the Santa Clara/Julian St exit 6, then the CA-87 exit on the left. Exit 6B approaching Julian, right onto West St James, 2nd left onto N Market and the first right onto Devine!

Now you know the way to SAN JOSE! Welcome!
(Warning: directions may differ depending on your point of departure.)

Alternatively, you could just stay home and listen to the song.